It’s after Thanksgiving and not yet Christmas, which means IT’S TIME TO LOOK AT MANATEE THINGS YOU COULD POSSIBLY GIVE TO PEOPLE AS GIFTS! I’ll poke around the internet/Etsy for the best/worst in manatee-related products and share it all with youuuuuuuuuuu.
A few days ago the story was something like “POLICE LOOKING FOR WOMAN WHO RODE MANATEE,” but now we know who she is and the waters around Fort De Soto Park are safe once more!
…Honestly, I feel pretty bad for the woman (and the manatee), who is now the face/body of “manatee molestation,” even if she did do something inexplicably stupid that also happens to be illegal. Authorities have reported that the manatee didn’t seem to be physically hurt. As for mentally…well, we just don’t know.
On the upside, her manatee joy ride has surely spread awareness about manatees across the intarwubs. In case you forgot, manatees are endangered; don’t touch or harass ‘em. But feel free to adopt them!
If you live in Alabama and your car isn’t brandishing one of these manatee-themed license plate, then you’re really not using your car to its fullest potential. Did you just feel that? …That wave of shame? Yeah.